My Accutane Journey - 1st Month

Halo everyone.

This is a continuity of my previous post "Pimples Drama".
So, you guys better check this first: http://springonvenus.blogspot.com/2013_07_01_archive.html

Yesterday, I've been through the Accutane Treatment for a month. The first excruciating-month. Literally, I mean it.
You may think this post is exaggerating. But trust me do not comment until you walk in my shoes.
My face getting more itchy, burn, and hurt day by day. Not to mention the lost appetite, hair loss, and mental problem.

On the first and second week, I got the worst breakout on my entire life. I can't barely feel my skin face, its all cover with acne! Then this big girl locked herself at home, cried over and over. I was at home on Ied vacation. Mom and Dad were so worried about my condition.
The most excruciating time is on morning, when I'm using acne lotion and sunscreen. Feels like there are thousand ants walking on my face.

I read on the internet that this is normal. Accutane will caused acne worst at first, but it will work after third month.  

Then here it comes, the first day at work, after vacation.
I got a sleepless night, because over thinking. Tried to composed the answer of "what happens to your face?" "Oh, my God, it's getting worst!" "Shasa kenapa?" "Kok bisa sih Sha?" "Coba ke dokter ini deh....bla bla bla..."

On the day, these things really happened. But I'm stronger than I thought I would be.
I answered the questions with smiles.

Day by day getting more and more hard.
Dry skin, dry lips, I handled it before it comes. Petroleum Jelly, lip balm, body lotion, and mineral water are my best friends.
I lost 4 kilos because of lost appetite. Which I don't really happy, because my weight was on normal scale! And now I'm officially underweight.
I can't exposed to sunlight. It burns and become red. I avoid more eye contact with people. I turn aside from crowd. I put my head down when the elevator opens. I feel like everyone is whispering on my back saying "that's a poor thing happens to that girl's face..."
Camera? Oh just don't ask me.
Feels like I'm shrinking to the corner of my office room, or hoping take a long holiday in a cave on desert island until my skin face back to normal.

Reading a forum about accutane treatment really makes me feeling better. All I can do is stick to it, be patient, and closed my ears. Because this thing need long time, 6 months!
I'm trying so hard not to get stress and depressed, because another trouble will come to me if I do.

I really hope my skin back like it used to be, just like 9 months ago.

Good thing needs time.